Cruel Jokes, Surely

Some cruel jokes are taking place around here, lately.  Surely.


I give you, exhibit A:


The driver either looked excited to be getting off the highway or ecstatic to be getting away from our crazed looks.


Whereby, last week, just last week, I passed this truck getting off the exit ramp to go home. My children and I all gave the driver an oh-so-cheerful wave.  You know?  One of those “you drive the best truck ever because   our mama we would surely perish without the aid of your delicious products once a day in a blue moon” kinda looks?  Yeah. One of those.


But, never again.  If you haven’t yet heard the earth shattering news of my beloved Hostess Company‘s impending demise, please! Do not shoot the messenger.  While I did read, today, that The Twinkie will survive, that does nothing to assuage my deep sadness over the loss of my beloved Devil Dogs.


Then, there is exhibit B:


Wow. What incredibly tragic timing.


Really?  Really, Lands End?  I heart you.  I really do.  But, what in the name of all the Turkey in Heaven were you thinking sending out a bathing suit issue 3 stinkin’ days before Thanksgiving day?  I ask you.  Because, truly?  The last thing I’m interested in thinking about, before I head into Triptofan Oblivion, is what bathing suit I’d like to be wearing come June.  Word-a-Mercy!


And then, there is this:


Well-meaning? Yes. Useful? Nope.


Some dear sweet “Anonymous” friend left me a card in my mailbox with belated Birthday wishes and this gift card.  It is to PetSmart.  Unfortunately, we no longer have any pets.  I do not intend to buy a new one with this card.  And, I’m left to wonder, who in the world cares about me enough to drop a belated birthday card and yet not well enough to know that our pet has been gone from 4 months.  Puzzling, no?


However, hope springs eternal!  My Sweetman bravely went out to forage the grocery stores so that I would be kept in Devil Dogs at least through next week month.  He does love me so.  And he is wise, to boot!  (He also picked up a few of his own beloved Ring Dings.  Not my bag. Nor are the Coffee Cakes; but far be it from me to judge.)  And, lest you think I jest, I give you the final exhibit:


We are (were) an equal opportunity Drakes family.


That should hold us over for a few days weeks.  And for that, I am thankful.  Oh, yes indeedy!


Are you going to miss Hostess?  Which variety?   C’mon, you’re among friends here.  You can tell us…





8 thoughts on “Cruel Jokes, Surely

  1. Your gift card is absolutely the funniest thing ever. Maybe it’s a sign you need a new pet.

    Swimsuits in November? I just put mine away and I don’t want to think about it until June, because thinking about it would cause me to have to exercise. Ya, I’m not ready.

  2. I am quite partial to Funny Bones but I think that might be a Drake’s product. My sister and I conversed today about what an American icon Hostess was and I am not sure my kids had a Hostess cupcake more than once in their life. AND THEY HAVE NEVER HAD A TWINKIE! Bad mommy, Bad mommy. They have missed out on some good ole American culture.

  3. YUM!! I’m sure you will share your bounty with your friend!!!! 🙂

    And oh no on the Petsmart card. 😦 It’s the thought that counts? Maybe you could donate it to the Humane Society or something–sure they always need supplies!

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