“Beautiful are the difficult things. Nothing worth it’s easy.”
That quote haunts me on many an occasion. When I think to remember it, I rail against it. I’d rather not remember it. I’d rather things be easy. There are moments, with Sweetboy in particular, when I wonder why things can’t be easier.
Our life with him is beautiful, oh yes it is. A differently-colored beautiful, to be sure. But easy? Not by a long shot. And I look over and see this other mama running this race to the finish line next to me. She contends day in and day out with the physical realities of a child with disabilities. I contend day in and day out with the emotional realities of a child with disabilities. I compare my race to hers. I come up short.
That’s the fleshly part of me talking, of course. The spirit within me gently nudges me toward something else. Remember this?
“Do not despise the small things. The Lord delights to see the work begin.”
I’m being reminded, yet again, of the importance of hanging on to this verse. With every fiber of my being I want it to be true of me that I do not despise these small victories.
His obvious joy and delight in his little sissy.
The increasing number of nights out of every 7 that he is able to fall asleep before 11:00.
The one morning he rises at 5:40 instead of 5:04.
The Monday he comes home and doesn’t melt down at the mere thought of homework.
That one brilliant beaming smile as he gets off the bus.
His increasing willingness to try something new, way outside of his comfort zone.
No, indeed. I will not despise these small beginnings. And I choose to see the beauty in the difficulty that this child brings into our lives. And let all the rest go.
Because, he is ours.
And we love him so.