Interrupted by Grace on Day Nineteen

I had another post planned for today.

But God…

Sweetboy informed me, this morning, that he hates it when I “go all psycho” when we need to get out the door for church.

Y’all.

I couldn’t even.

I had to take a minute and just slump down and cry.

There are Sundays where we all pitch in and work as a team to get out the door. It takes the type of planning and forethought that I’m sure even Bobby Fischer could appreciate.

Honestly, the child is right. It’s a rare morning, Sunday or not, without some sort of “For the love, child, GET YOUR SHOES ON” statement being made as I wrangle everyone out of the house. All The Planning is something I’ve let slide. Plus, it wears me out. So I don’t plan often. Or enough.

Clearly.

In that moment, I just wanted to hang up the towel and sit on the couch with some coffee and have a good pity party. Wouldn’t lamenting the fact that God forgot to give me a stronger “planning gene” be a better use of my time than sitting in church with my mind going over and over that terrible horrible conversation with Sweetboy?

No.

And I could feel Him gently nudging my heart, and telling me so.

The kids were nowhere near ready, but I was. So, Sweetman stayed behind and they did church together, at home. Sweetboy was picking out some worship music and Sweetgirl was running upstairs to get her pretty pink lamby Bible, as I left.

Why did I leave without them?

I needed to.

My own heart needed to be able to get quiet and be surrounded by the voices of some faithful. It needed to glide into a pew and worship the God of grace. More importantly, sometimes, this girl needs to retreat and regroup.

I really needed to do that, most of all.

And here’s what Grace whispered: “You are here. Be still and let me remind you of what I have overcome so that you can come confidently before me.”

So, I did. I got real still and just tuned my heart to grace.

And when I got back home, everyone was happy to see me and share what they’d done for “church” at home.

We all snuggled in as I explained how hurtful it was to hear that mama gets “psycho” in the morning. Sweetboy then explained how yucky it makes him feel when I’m rushing, rushing, rushing some mornings. Important apologies, laced with all sorts of grace, took place.

It become painfully clear that even though planning takes a lot out of me, it is in the best interest of my mission field down the hall that I do it. And, I do believe that God will honor my desire to provide a less chaotic kind of morning routine.

Grace interrupted my morning to rain down on me, even as it showed me the need for some change. That’s what Grace does. It loves me too much to leave me where I am.

I am so thankful.

Yes indeedy.

31days_of_grace_button_missindeedy

This is day 19 of my Write 31 Days challenge.

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16 thoughts on “Interrupted by Grace on Day Nineteen

  1. Pingback: 31 Days of Grace | Missindeedy

    • That’s what makes my heart sing, knowing that I do not walk the road of grace, alone. (But, I do wear flip-flops while on them.) πŸ˜‰

  2. Great stuff! I can definitely relate to this with our crazy get-out-the-door-there’s-so-much-to-do Sundays. Thanks for sharing this. Offers some needed perspective.

  3. I’ve gone psycho plenty of times on Sunday morning. Last time was when I was dressed 30 minutes before we were to leave and my daughter came downstairs in her pjs about the time we needed to go. I was so angry. I hate going in late week after week. So true that those moments steal all the joy from church. Glad you made it and it was good. πŸ™‚

    • Jamie, thank you! And, may I just say that nothing makes my blood boil more than seeing someone wake up and decide to “start getting ready” as we’re needing to walk out the door. I start chanting “Grace” like a madwoman!

  4. We had that same morning, except I lost it. I sent my family to church and took a drive with my favorite Christian radio station. My heart was too angry to go to Gods house and act like all was fine when it was not. Not to God, but to others. You know. I guess I shouldn’t care that two of my three kids have left their church shoes at places other than church, and had to wear sneakers. But today, it was the straw.

    We both got what we needed, which was some time alone with Himself. Thanks for sharing.

    • Girlfriend… I. Hear. That. Church shoes, school shoes, SHOES, are often the last straw over here, too. I’m glad that God brought us what we needed today. I’m even gladder that our hearts were still willing to draw close, instead of pull away completely. Here’s to an amazing week!

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