Weekend Review

Riveting name for a blog post, I know.  Please, try to contain your excitement.

And, if you are still here, Bless Your Heart.

I kicked off the weekend by killing The Largest Fly I have ever had the displeasure of meeting in an area enclosed by walls.  I informed my Facebook friends that I almost felt the need to deliver a eulogy for the dad-gum thing.  I didn’t , of course, because then you’d have bigger concerns than what else I was going to write in my weekend review.  Concerns that centered around thoughts like “Why am I reading this blog again?”.  Followed closely, I can only imagine, by thoughts like “Does her husband realize the extent of The Crazy rattling around in there?”. He does. Oh, how he does.


Things took a decidedly more upbeat turn when Sweetman and I headed out for date night. Finally.

My man and I love Star Trek. Okay, I have to back that train right up.  So, here’s how this really breaks down. Sweetman is a Trekkie.  And my father, Captain Ahab, loved him some Star Trek, too.  I have fond and vivid memories of watching Jim (I really can’t call him James – he’s far too wild for that!) Tiberius Kirk fight for civilizations that knew nothing of the final frontier of space.  I also decided early on that the Tribbles were awfully cute.  But, I digress.

When Sweetman and I were dating, he re-introduced me to the love of all things Star Trek.  I really hope you get where this is going, because I fear I’m going to end up being flagged as one of those wack-a-doodle Star Trek fanatics if I have to continue on with all the ‘splainin.

We went to see the “new” Star Trek movie. And I got to grab that husband of mine’s arm a few times, and practically jump into his lap.  I consider that a WIN for date night, don’t you? Plus, HELLO, popcorn for dinner.  Total. Win.

We also, just so you know how NORMAL we really are, went out for an appetizer and a drink afterwards.  Now, we were pretty deep in the middle of our Discussin’ when the entire restaurant exploded in an uproar of clapping and hootin’ and hollerin’.  It turns out that the Boston Bruins won game four, in the Hockey Playoffs.  We live in the midst of Bruins Country, people. However, we were simply too in love and in the moment to notice the TV screens.

No, no.  Actually, we were deeply in love with the taste of these illegally good “Sirloin Spring Rolls” we were eating.  That’s the way we roll.  I just wanted to keep it real for ya.

Sweetgirl and I rounded out our weekend with something that I unexpectedly enjoyed.

My sweet five-year old was invited to go to a “Fashion Party”. At Claire’s.  In the mall.  On Sunday morning.  For a five-year old.


I’d like to be able to say that I was able to keep up My Indignation until we walked back into the house two hours later.

Alas, I cannot.

Did you know, DID YOU KNOW, that they have leg warmers and shredded foot-less tights and finger-less gloves (way cuter than I remember them from back in the 80’s) there?  And, AND, they had so many different kinds of sunglasses, that at one point, one of the other moms suggested I go ahead and put down my purse and join in the dressing up.  I was this many shades of tempted to do just that.  But, I held my inner Madonna in check and just watched with glee as my daughter tried on about every sparkly necklace that she could get her hands on.  And she picked a mighty fine tutu, purse, and fairy wings to “model”, might I add.


We returned home with far too many a few hair bows, and an unplanned stuffed animal.

And, just so that we’re all clear, I may not have stepped foot into a Claire’s since 1988, but y’all, I am SO going back.

Oh. Yes. I. Am!

We closed out our riveting weekend by stopping by Starbuck’s drive-thru to get daddy a coffee.  I was trying desperately to text Sweetman to make sure he hadn’t already made his Starbuck’s run.  This is what ensued:


Happy Monday my sweet friends!

Basic Cooking Skills Required

Dear Mom,

I wish you’d told me a few things about this Motherhood gig.

  1. Poop happens.  Or, even worse, it doesn’t.
  2. The song “Rain, Rain, Go Away” really has no power.
  3. Sleeping won’t happen when you want it to and will happen when you don’t want it to.
  4. God will sometimes feel absent.
  5. Friends are a necessary component to sanity.
  6. “A moment on the lips is forever on the hips” really kicks in at 40.
  7. Words can hurt so deeply.
  8. Hugs can be so healing.
  9. Basic cooking skills are required because children like to eat at least 3 or 6 times a day.
  10. Comparing rarely works out.
  11. A good strong power-walk will allow you to return to the house with some of your hair still intact.
  12. There will be so many tears.
  13. One really good babysitter is essential.
  14. The ability to function without sleep will rank up there with a medical resident’s.
  15. People will have such strong opinions about parenting.
  16. Kids are so resilient.
  17. Money will mean very little.
  18. The words you don’t want to be repeated, will indeed be.
  19. There will be so many moments where your heart feels full to exploding.
  20. Remember to pray. A lot.

This list is by no means exhaustive.   Oh, no, it isn’t.  And I’m sure I’ll think of about 20 more after I hit “publish”. But, I’m more curious what some of yours are.  Tell me!

Why, yes, that IS a Cabbage Patch Doll. And, yes, I am indeed sporting Farah Fawcett wings.

What do you wish you’d been told about Motherhood?