You Know When You Can’t Find That One Hair?

If you’ve got hair, (and I’m not judging because, Sweetman… well, he doesn’t) then you will totally know the feeling I’m about to describe.

You’re going about your business and you feel a hair that has clearly sprung loose from your head. It’s somewhere right… over… there. No! Maybe farther down your back, right down… there. NO! Dadgumit! Where is that blasted hair?

You can feel it. It tickles the back of your arm every time you turn slightly left. Or bend down to get the stray cheerio off the floor.

Determined to find it, you start grabbing at the back of your shirt in quick grabby bursts, hoping that you’ll nab it.

And suddenly, you find yourself on an all-out assault on this errant hair.

But, then, you’ve had it! So, you remove your arms from the sleeves of your shirt and turn the thing around so that you can do a full-on search for this dratted hair.

AH! There you are… gotcha!

Except, your darling husband walks in to find you standing in the middle of the room, eyes all wild, with neither of your arms through the sleeve holes in your shirt, irritated as all get out, muttering about a hair.

He looks at you like he doesn’t know whether to snap a picture and Instagram it, or potentially have you committed.

So, you say, “You know when you can’t find that one hair?”

And he calmly says, “No.”

And you realize that you are directing your question to the (nearly) bald-headed love of your life.

This leads to a deep sigh.

From both of you.

Followed, thankfully, by laughter.

And that, my friends, is marriage.

Yes indeedy.

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Crazy Demons, BE OUT!

When things go stir-crazy around here, Sweetman and I have a little catchphrase we use to lighten the situation: “Crazy Demons, BE OUT!” (And for some reason, you simply must say this as if you’re from the deep deep South.)

We use it jokingly. But, once we get a moment to catch our breath, we realize The Current State of Crazy for what it is –not of God.  Our God is not a God of chaos.  This, we know to be true.

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So when Sweetgirl starts sassin’ it up or Sweetboy has a meltdown of epic proportions, we can be heard loudly proclaiming things like, “Sassy Demons, BE OUT!”

Here’s the thing, – I know full well that their Crazy gets turned on by their deepest insecurities.

And why?

Because that’s true of me, too.

When Sweetboy is in the midst of an Epic Detour down some mental rabbit hole, ultimately, he is questioning if what we tell him about himself is true.  “Am I really loved? Am I really a necessary member of this family?”.  His heart, clouded by the darkness that lingers with the growing knowledge that Autism makes him “different”, will delve deeply into All The Negative.  And we don’t want him to stay there. So we jokingly say, “Negative Demons BE OUT!”. He cracks a small grin and then tries, oh, how he tries, to go back to that dark place.  But we won’t let him. We want him to hear, again and again, that what is true is that he is loved, not for what he can accomplish or for how he looks, or doesn’t. We love him because he is ours.

In those moments, I’m often whispered to by my own Abba – “You are loved, already, too.  You are mine, too.”

And when Sweetgirl throws down in one of her spectacular efforts to Control All Things, she’s really just asking if what we’re telling her will benefit her – in the way she most desires it to. As her Crazy ramps up with each deafening “I don’t want to”, we can be heard singing, “Looney Tune Demons BE OUT!”. And she giggles and protests that she isn’t a wascally wabbit.  And we take the opportunity to remind her that her tantrums aren’t beneficial to her getting her way. That you win more flies with honey than with vinegar.

Softly, I hear my Adonai reminding me of the same. “This battle you are fighting? It isn’t for you. It is not necessary. Leave it. Follow me.”

Oh, how patiently my gracious God bears with me!

Indeed.

Teach me, God, to filter all that I take in and sift it with your Holiness. Take this broken heart of mine and make it whole with Your Truth.

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I’m linking up with the community over at the P31 Online Bible Study Blog. We continue to journey through Made to Crave, by Lysa TerKeurst, and today, we’re chatting about how our insecurities can push us into crazy modes (and a couple of other things that try to steal our peace). Crazy Good Stuff!

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